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P1_01 Giant Owl / Spear of Destiny
#1
Before I went to bed last night I meditated on Religion and Death and had two dreams.

In the first dream, I am going into some sort of building. I think it might have been a store... there I meet a small child in a wheelchair. The boy looked to be about 1 or 2 years old and had a precious little face... but he was mentally disabled. He reminded me alot of my youngest son for some reason. I felt like this child had been treated poorly, and upon talking to a woman who worked in the store I learned that he had been put up for adoption and soon, if he weren't adopted, he would become a child of the state.

Well, this really upset me. I had instantly fallen in love with this little boy and wanted to keep him! I thought to myself that I would adopt him without saying anything to my husband... because I believed that if he just SAW the boy, he would instantly love him too. But then I started thinking about things that would be involved with raising a disabled child. The only thing that concerned me for some reason was the money. I was thinking in the dream how I had four children to care for at home... would it really be fair for me to bring home another? How would I support this child financially, especially if he needed special equipment, medications and schooling? Honestly, I thought I could handle the schooling. I have a tremendous amount of patience and creative enough to make learning fun for any kid... (If I were to toot my own horn). In fact, I have even developed my own programs that have taught my kids anything from their ABC's to basic reading. Once I discover a learning pattern, it's all downhill from there... but the medication and equipment. For some reason, government assistance with the child was not an option... and so, I thought it would be unfair to adopt the child without knowing for a fact that I would be able to care for him. It would not be fair to him or my children if I were unprepared to take him on and afford what I needed for EVERYONE. Instead, I chose to get a job in that little store in order to care for the child and keep a close eye on him. If the time came where he was going to be sent into a home, I would take him immediately, but until then, I would care for him outside of my home until I could afford to take him in.

It seemed like the little store was some sort of clothing store maybe? It was at least a store that sold clothes because I cleaned out fitting rooms and folded and hung clothes most of the day. I would take breaks to play with the little boy and fix him snacks and meals. He seemed to be happy and to genuinely love me. I started to feel uncomfortable though. I could feel someone's eye beams on me. (That feeling you get when you KNOW someone is watching you...) I turned to see a very nice looking man watching me and the boy. The guy looked to be my age or just slightly older. He smiled and disappeared behind a display. I shrugged it off and went back to work. I somehow found out that the man was the disabled boy's older brother... Later, I saw the man again with a group of friends. The friends were rowdy and rude like a lot of young people in their twenties. They started teasing him about having a crush on me and when he said nothing they blurted out rude things like "OMG, why would you like HER?" As if I was just the most hideous person on the planet of something. It actually hurt my feelings for a moment and then I though "Wait a minute... why would I be with someone like THAT! They have it all backwards!" You can tell a lot about a person from the company they keep, and though the guy himself seemed to be ok, he had some really rude friends and was not stepping up to take care of his brother. I chose to ignore them and went to work folding and sorting clothes. After working for a while, I was directed to sort clothes on a bottom rack and to hurry. I pulled the clothes out and folded them being careful to arrange them by color when I was stopped by my boss. She yelled at me that I was doing it wrong! I had to put the clothes into sets and each set had matching shirts, pants, some sort of card, and small pack of necessities. I had to hurry because a flood was coming. (It made perfect sense in the dream...)

I finished my work and we all evacuated the store. I went home and sat on my back porch to relax. I was upset that I wasn't with the little boy, but was also glad to be at home resting. My husband came outside to sit with me and we talked. There was a big tree in our yard where our children's swing set is... and I was admiring it before I heard a hoot. A big hoot. I looked up to see a giant owl in that tree. I was horrified because I am afraid of owls. I can't tell you why... I've just always been afraid of them... more so than snakes or spiders even. Anyway... this particular owl was gigantic and I felt like it was watching me so I told my husband and he laughed and said I was being paranoid. Well... he had also told me a while back that owls didn't grow very big. Clearly, he didn't know what he was talking about. After sitting and feeling creeped out for some time, I thought I might try to scare it off and I charged at the tree causing the owl to disappear into the thick leaves. Smug and satisfied, I marched back to my chair and sat down. Moments later, it came back out, so I charged the tree again, but I had to run closer to it because it wasn't as easy to scare away. This went on two or three more times before that freakin' owl wouldn't so much as budge. Not even if I threw things at it. I was very uneasy now because I didn't know what to do to get rid of that owl...

I was with my husband now on the left side of our back yard planning on how I was going to build some raised garden beds. I could feel those haunting eye beams and turned around to see that owl standing on the grass several yards away from me and my hair stood on end. I charged the owl and it flew away. A little while later, it came back and stomped across the grass at me, and I charged it again... and it reluctantly flew away again. My husband laughed and told me he had to go inside to get some measuring tape, he would be right back. While he was gone, however, that owl came back again! It stomped across the grass even quicker towards me as if it were going to attack, and I charged it... this time I had to be practically on top of it for it to fly away. It was a close one and my heart was beating very fast... and then it came back. This time it charged and I charged and we met in the middle. It attacked me so I tried to grab it. This owl was maybe 4 feet tall or so and it was rough to wrestle. It had it's beak going, trying to bite me. I managed to grab it's legs and hold it upside down and was surprised to find that it had little thin chicken legs under all of those feathers, but as I held it upside down, its claws were going... scratching me with its nasty toes. I was screaming bloody murder and my husband came out to see me holding it and I screamed for him to grab a cage or something for me to put it in before it got me. He ran back inside, but I managed to find an old cage that I once used for my ferrets. I somehow managed to bind the owl's legs together and threw it in the cage. Now the owl was smaller (about the size of a large chicken) and resembled a green parrot. It was trying to talk, trying to curse me... and honestly, had it not scared the crap out of me, I might have found it funny.

I refused to let that cage out of my sight and my husband wanted to go out to eat, so I had him tie a rope to the cage and I dragged it behind me to the restaurant. We went to a seafood restaurant with a pirate theme and I got a lot of surprised looks as I took my seat having this giant, caged, cursing bird sitting next to me. I was kind of hoping that someone else would want it and I could get rid of it, but at the same time, I was worried that if they released it, it would just come back to haunt me.

I woke up and took a sip of water before jotting down some reminders in my journal. I was upset that my dream didn't seem to have a lot to do with my mission, so I meditated on Religion + Death for a second time and went back to sleep.

This time I dreamt that I was in a beautiful forest looking at wild flowers growing everywhere. I felt lovely and so at ease when I was startled by a loud male voice right beside me that screamed "PAY ATTENTION!" Shocked, I turned around to find that there was no one there, but just as I was about to go back to looking at the flowers, I noticed three men walking together. It seemed like I didn't have a body now and I was watching them in third person. I instantly recognized the first man as the Pope, the second man was middle eastern and I recognized him as a Muslim, the third man was a normal-looking older white man, and I recognized him as a Christian. I thought this was interesting because they were all walking along calmly, talking and making jokes. It seemed in the dream that there should be more tension between them, but they acted as if they were all good friends.

As they walked down a path in the woods, they came across the Mormon bishop of the church I used to attend. They invited him to come along with them but he politely declined. He acted as if he were in a hurry to get somewhere else and smiled before saying goodbye and walking away at a very fast pace. The three other men seemed to be offended and very annoyed at him and started making fun of him talking about his googly glasses and weird hair... and I felt a bit ashamed because I had to smirk a bit... he DID have googly glasses and weird hair. Anyway, I kept following them for what seemed to be FOREVER. We got to a large city, one I have never seen before. The buildings looked very old. They reminded me of some of the Greek architecture you see in movies... you know, with arches and statues. Well, right in the middle of the city was a great, big cathedral-looking building... but it was odd... because it looked as if it were three churches merged into one. The middle looked full-fledged cathedral with stain glassed windows, the left part was a slightly different color with one of those tear-drop shaped bubbly domes on it... it reminded me of a fancy mosque. And the left part of it was made out of a different material and had small cross shaped windows. It was kinda like a mall or one of those merged fast food restaurants.... Have you ever seen one of those Pizzahut/Taco Bell buildings where it is ONE building but there is one store on one side and another on the other? It was like that, only for churches. It was so weird... and it seemed like they should clash, but they were all getting along and I thought this was a good thing at first.

As we walked towards this megachurch, the men started arguing about what should be put on the top of the church. The Pope thought that a gold statue of Virgin Mary should be on top and the Christian thought it should be a cross. The Muslim man thought it should be something else, but I can't remember what it is he thought should be up there anymore. I wondered why they couldn't just put all three up there on the top and then thought that it must be because three huge, heavy gold statues might make the ceiling cave in on them. That was the only thing I could think would be the problem. At any rate, they bickered until we got into the building.

The inside of the building reminded me a little bit of a Mormon temple in that there seemed to be many different rooms for different rituals/ religious practices. It was pristine and beautiful. The walls were white with gold trim and there was elegant gold designs everywhere and things made out of crystal to include a huge, bright and beautiful crystal chandelier. It was amazing! It was breathtaking! The people in the building bowed their heads in reverence to the men as they walked by. Some of them even fell to the floor and bowed with their foreheads touching the ground. Some of them cried.

I followed the men into a darker doorway. Inside was a spiraling staircase that went downwards. As we walked down, the lights got dimmer. We came to a huge locked door. It took all three men to unlock this door which looked a bit like a vault. When we stepped inside, there seemed to be a bunch of old artifacts in there. Super old books, suits of armor, weapons... I was especially fascinated with a goblet I saw in there. It reminded me of the Holy Grail and I wanted to touch it, but it seemed like if it were the Holy Grail, I had better keep my hands off of it. I didn't feel like I would be worthy of touching it... but then I started getting amused because it made me think of Monty Pythons quest for the Holy Grail. I was sort of hoping I would see the killer bunny somewhere (It made sense in the dream), but no luck. After looking around though, I DID find the holy hand grenade and was just tickled pink! I couldn't believe it existed... but then wondered what it might be used for... especially since I didn't see that killer rabbit anywhere.

After a while, I watched as the men all armed themselves with some of the ancient weapons. The Middle Eastern man chose some sort of curved sword. It looked like someone tried to merge a sword with a scythe. It was gold and silver... and pretty creepy looking. The Pope took a strange-looking spear. It was purple and gold with little decorative charms and beads on it. The tip had three blades on the end and they were gold. The older man took a sword. The blade was silver, and the handle was gold and white. I'm pretty sure it had a fleur de lis on the handle...

Anyway, after arming themselves, they went back out of the door and headed down the spiraled staircase again. The lower we got, the darker things were... we came to an OLD wooden door. Something you might expect to see from a medieval castle. When they opened the door, we walked into a large, dark room. It was like a huge ballroom almost... but was super creepy like something you would expect to see out of a Dracula movie. There were candle fixtures on the wall and bones lying everywhere. I assumed them to be human bones. There were cages with what looked to be starving children hanging from the ceiling... and in the very back was a well. The well had such an evil feeling coming out of it that I refused to see what was in it. The room itself was FILLED. Many of the people I didn't recognize, but there were a few celebrities and famous people I did... like Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerburg, Michelle and Barak Obama, and a lot of other people like celebrities where I knew their faces, but not quite their names. Some of them were actors. Everyone was mingling like you would expect at a fancy party... drinking drinks and snacking on finger foods, but fell silent as the three men entered. The crowd split and I could see down the divide to a man sitting in what looked to be almost a throne. Next to him was an even bigger and fancier throne, but it was much larger and much more fancy. I wondered who sat in that one. The man in the smaller throne, however, gave me a very strange and horrifying feeling. I've had bad feelings before... but this wasn't only more piercing... but it had an unfamiliar feeling of fear around it. It was overpowering and strange. I just don't know how to describe this feeling... even after waking up, its haunting... the man was holding an old, OLD beat up spear. I looked at it amused for a minute, because I thought that if everyone started fighting in that room, he would be the first one to go down. That thing was an antique for sure! It looked brittle and as if the tip was nothing more than an old, elongated arrow head. As I sat there semi-amused and wondering just WHAT he thought he would accomplish with that thing, the voice spoke to me again. It was the voice from earlier, but it sounded cool and calm... very soothing. He asked me if I knew what that man was holding. I told him I did not. Then he replied that it was the "spear of destiny".

I woke up thinking that maybe I had been playing too many games with my husband, though I don't play very serious games... I tend to stick with stuff like Mario or Zelda and don't play very often. But the "Spear of Destiny" sounds exactly like something strait out of a video game. I told my husband the dream early this morning... when I got to the part of the voice asking me if I knew what that man was holding, my husband cut me off saying "It was the spear of destiny, wasn't it?" I was shocked and asked him how he knew and he told me that there is some sort of legend about the spear of destiny being made out of one of the nails that pierced Christ... or something like that.
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