The Great Italian Dictionary Caper

[Jean-Claude Duclos]

Me and my friends Chip and Adam were in some kind of vigilante crime fighting squad. I wanted to find lyrics for some WWII Fascist songs in Italian, so we all went to this "Italian American Cultural Center" and I was going to ask if they had lyrics. I asked the woman at the desk, who was speaking perfect English in a very robotic tone. I told her I wanted lyrics for some old Italian military songs. She said "From the First World War?" I winked and nudged her and said, "No, the OTHER world war." She said they do not have any, and I got up to leave. Chip and Adam told me they had a plan of some kind. Chip got out a big book and purposely spilled Pepsi all over it, pretending it was an accident and made a big scene. While everyone was looking at him, Adam shoved an Italian-English dictionary into a briefcase he was carrying. We all hurried out of the building and went back to the car. Adam took out the dictionary and he said, "Yes, we got it!" I asked, "Ok, so WHY exactly did we do that?" And they claimed it was so that we could learn Italian to help investigate Italian criminals.