Ron Swanson and the Delicate Balance of Nature

[Elyse]

The earliest I can remember in this dream, I was in a canoe floating down a stream in a dense forest. Behind me was Ron Swanson holding a large pole and I wondered why he didn't use the pole to propel himself forward a bit faster to meet me so that we could talk. He didn't seem like his normal character. He was quiet and reserved and spoke softly. As if he knew my thoughts, he told me that he wouldn't paddle and that I shouldn't paddle because we might "Disturb the delicate balance of nature". I could see in my mind the mud coming up from the bottom of the stream muddying up the water... but I couldn't understand why that would disturb the balance of nature... it would settle again, right? But I didn't argue, I watched him sort of sit in his canoe in a meditative-like state until we came to land.

We got out and walked across a grassy meadow. There were many grassy hills in the distance, and we could see many middle eastern terrorist hiding about the hills working to arm themselves and scoping out the area. There was also a middle eastern farmer/ goat herder near them. He didn't seem to be part of their terrorist group. He just worked quietly by himself in the background. Soon the terrorist saw us and began to attack us. WIthout saying a word, Ron Swanson took the pole/staff he had been carrying and it grew very long. Hundreds of feet long I would guess, and he gave the terrorist a good whoopin'. The way he fought with the pole was so elegant and beautiful it reminded me of something you would see on a kung fu show. He acted as if it took little to no effort to take out this entire terrorist group and when they were all face-down on the ground (no idea if they were dead or just knocked out) he had the pole retract and without a word, we continued to walk to wherever we were going.

As we passed the hills, the farmer got enraged by us. He began cussing and spitting at us demanding that we fight him too, but Ron ignored him and continued to walk away and I followed Ron. The farmer then told us that if we didn't fight him he would kill people and rape women. He would start a new terrorist organization. Ron continued to walk away until the man picked up one of the terrorist's guns and aimed it at us. Without a word, Ron turned around and his pole stretched out again. He took the farmer down very quickly before he was able to shoot us, then had his pole retract again. I saw his face before I woke up and he looked troubled and like he didn't want to have to hurt the farmer, but the farmer meant to hurt us. He reminded me that I wasn't to disrupt the balance of nature, and began walking again.