1/25/15 Unholy Struggle / Competition (& more nudity)

[G0'D]

gosh i have so many questions, and i hate to whine to myself about all MY questions….but through dreaming and an ability to see life, right as it is. I really do wonder who is in 'supposed' control. I was a lucid dreamer, and i was fearless (note the tense) and i had many what i could call "bring it on dreams"….like f//>>,;ken BRING IT ON. Take me and show me and fucking tell me why i should be afraid of you. I am quite a literary person so for me it was, circles of hell, had i not known about dante's inferno then the look may have been different but i went through it, lower and darker and horrific and i came out the other end once, into a dazzling lightness an azure of beauty and before i woke up i said "but it is you who make a hell of heaven and a heaven of hell". really . then i stopped. I may choose not to have a glass of wine before bed to assure myself of the perfect lucid dreams or i may not. I will though be certain for the rest of my life that i have seen the conflict, and the conflict is me.